Guilty vs. No Contest?

I'm not feeling great today so I'm sorry if I don't have the same "up attitude" I had last week. I'm not sick....just not all here. I'm actually typing this in my favorite cozy "Budweiser: King of Beers" sweatshirt which is my go-to on days like this. I know at this point you're wondering if I'm a lush and the answer is no. I happen to have gotten this sweatshirt at the Tampa Busch Gardens when it started pouring in the middle of our day of fun. It turns out the only thing they sell at Busch Gardens is Busch branded gear so I acquired this lovely outerwear for the bargain price of $35 (it went well with my $7 soda). It never fails that I am wearing this when a new neighbor decides to stop by or the Jehovah's Witnesses decide to put up camp on my front porch. Now that I think about it....this sweatshirt has never brought me any luck.

It's probably a good thing I am saving my energy today, because it is the beginning of Halloween Week! My dry-erase calendar is jam packed with Harvest Festivals, Halloween Parties, and other events with fall themed names that directly correlate to how PC the host is. I don't really care what you call the party, I just need to know if the kids are supposed to wear a costume. Because if I forget the costume at a "wear costumes" party or if I dress Emery in his costume at a "don't wear costumes" party....I am in DEEP mom trouble! Those 3 year self esteems are fragile! It would take a few suckers and a trip to Toys R' Us to repair that kind of damage on short notice and in time for the next event.

Emery's Newberg playgroup is having a potluck Halloween party tomorrow morning to kick the week off. Normally, right about now, I have my eyes fixated on the word "potluck" in complete terror. Just this last weekend, for example, I went to a small gathering of some of my best friends and it too was a potluck. I'm fortunate enough that I have 20+ years history with this particular group so I don't have to pretend that I had some genius idea for what to contribute. Instead I called "Amber" from the grocery store at T minus 2 hours until the party and asked her what she thought I should bring. I love that her game plan for the situation started with the clever instructions, "Go to the frozen food section." "That's funny "Amber!" Where exactly do you think I am calling you from? I'm staring at Toquitos as we speak." I digress...

Like I said, normally I would be worried about the potluck portion of tomorrow's festivities but I have bigger fish to fry in the city of Newberg tomorrow. I have traffic court! That's right I am going to physically appear for a "blocking a driveway" parking violation. I'm not sure at exactly what point I thought it would be a good idea to appear instead of just to pay the fine (actually I remember, it started with the words "fine cut in half") but whether I want to or not I'm locked into it at this point. So coincidentally, also in the morning, I get to see my tax dollars hard at work in the great Newberg Municipal Court. Wait...I don't live in Newberg so it's not really my taxes hard at work. Actually...I don't work so it doesn't matter what city we're in it's not technically my tax dollars ever.

I've never been to court! Up until this point in my life I've cried my way out of everything. Not on purpose...I'm just a nervous crier and it has served me well! As I understand it I have the option to plead "guilty" or "no contest." I have no idea what the difference is. I'm in good company though because I have asked at least a dozen intelligent people to explain this to me and no one seems to completely understand. Why can't there just be an option that says, "I plead guilty but in my defense the homeowner should have mowed their driveway so I could see that the cars were used for transportation and not as lawn decoration."

Since I'm not in a humorous mood today, I thought I would link you to a funny article or something. But I don't have time or energy to research one because I have to unwrap a whole bunch of Rice Krispie treats and put them on a plate for tomorrow. (Kidding people...that's only plan B)